Footnotes continued...
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"Last night I had a dream that I gave birth to Berg's baby, through some sort of artificial insemination. It was a short dream. All I saw was its feet. No kidding. Hooray for gender-bending dreams!"
            -L.J.
 
"This is so weird. I like it."
            -Amanda Torres, winner of Brave New Voices International Poetry Slam
 
"So what's the address of that website you were talking about?....I often happen to overhear conversations when I'm in restaurants, other places as well -and I want you to know that you're the first intelligent person I've heard speak today! I'm gonna look you up for sure. And I plan to send you my feet too."
  -Unknown woman (she didn't introduce herself) who appeared suddenly beside Rinda's table during a dinner out with friends
 
"Honey, YOU are a hoot! My toes salute you."
            -Ed Mowrey, radical forgiveness coach, teacher, & ceremony facilitator
 
"Pornography is the work of the devil. This is a flagrant example of the homosexual agenda which is desecrating the American family and corrupting our nation's moral underpinnings. Miss Berg's propaganda is what Isaiah refers to in chapter 59 verse 7 when he writes, 'Their feet run to evil, and they make haste to shed innocent blood: their thoughts are thoughts of iniquity; desolation and destruction are in their paths.' Her sin is against the very nature of life God put in us."
            -Rev. Nathaniel Wolshe, First Baptist Church
 
"Berg, you are my hero."
            -Ever McKinney, Special Ops Assistant at Wyndham Robertson Library
 
"Feet me! ohhhh Feet me!!!!! Yes!!! I love it!"
            -Samantha Majewski, Pediatric [not related to feet] Respiratory Therapist, RRT, NPS
 
"Who does rub your feet at night? And what makes that queer? I don't get you, woman. But if you wanna know how it's done right, you can bring your bottle of lube to my place anytime."
            -Hector Valdez, counterman and dishwasher at one of Berg's summer jobs
 
I once knew a girl with toe hair
Who welcomed uneasy stares.
She did what she liked
(Which was mostly all dykes
Because men are more than she can bear).
            -Eric Windmere, classical poet
 
"Migod, these girls have waaay too much time! This website is an argument for watching more TV."
            -Jen Stern, blogger
 
"Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand."
-Mark Twain

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